Revue Shows Scripts

If you are looking for a complete sketch show, then look no further!

We have bundled together sets of themed sketches to create a full programme of entertainment!

An Hour you won’t get back!

performances to date

Running Time:

1hr approximately

Cast:

Minimum 3m 2f

19 of our favorite short sketches in one collection, which can be performed as a complete revue or augmented with your choice of songs and other material. With a minimum cast of 5 performers (no maximum limit) and minimal set requirements.

Sketches include:

  • Anything to Declare: A traveler has his bags checked at Customs and some unusual items are discovered.
  • At the Bus stop: An elderly woman waits for the bus to arrive at the stop.
  • Cobra: A meeting of the top secret emergency response team cover some new threats…
  • Confessional: A stressed teenager visits a Priest to discuss his concerns…
  • Cops and Robbers: Barry describes to his dad how the kids today play cops and robbers…
  • Fantasy Games: Two teenage online gaming addicts are hassled to do their daily chores by their mother.
  • Godfather Christmas: Don Abalone has been volunteered to be the Santa at his child’s school party…
  • In the Bookshop: A daft sketch set in a bookshop.
  • In the Opticians: A customer visits the Opticians. Cue a string of daft eye and eyesight gags!
  • Mortal Fears: Geoff, a rather neurotic hypochondriac discusses his latest symptoms with his wife, Susan.
  • Panda Solution: An expert in breeding pandas in captivity explains a radical new programme…
  • The Frustrated Poet: A poet searches for his muse…
  • The Second Amendment: A hunter is interrogated by the police about his hunting gear.
  • Two Cops: A pair of policemen on patrol swap tales.
  • Two Farmers: Two farmers converse! A thinly disguised string of dreadful farmyard related jokes!
  • Zoocatraz: A visitor to the zoo discovers a strange secret…
  • Looking for Mr Evil: A hopeful candidate attends and interview for the position of Ultimate Galactic Dictator…
  • The Vacuuming Sketch: An allegorical comedy sketch where the genders have been reversed to make it more metaphorical..!
  • Shakespeare re-imagined: Dennis uses inspiration from one of the greats to help with his show titles…

All of the sketches are available to purchase and perform separately.

Apply for Performance Rights:

Licensing: This script is published through Lazy Bee Scripts. To read the whole script online and to make an application to perform the show please visit Lazy Bee Scripts.

Lazy Bee Scripts

Skitskreig

performances to date

Running Time:

40m approximately

Cast:

Minimum 4 performers

Written in collaboration with Mark Neil and Brian Two

Originally commissioned by a theatre company based in Spain, Skitskrieg! is a collection of silly sketches all with a World War Two theme.

The script includes a list of suggested wartime songs that can be interwoven into the running order for audience sing along!

Sketches include:

  • The Not so Great Escape: Three POW’s discuss possible escape plans in a World War 2 camp.
  • Keeping up with the Andersons: Jimmy’s dad thinks he has built the perfect Anderson air raid shelter, until he hears about his neighbour’s.
  • Cash in the Attic: It’s another edition of ‘Cash in the Attic’ and the team find some amazing items in Herr Schutzstaffel’s house.
  • The Health and Safety Inspector: The troops manning a dug out in the front line receive a visit from the Brigade Health and Safety inspector!
  • Changing Booms: The TV makeover show, makes over Doris and Charlie’s house!
  • SAS Selection: A rather camp interior designer applies for a position in the elite SAS.
  • Military Intelligence: Two German spies report back to their superior on their failed mission to London and blame the map provided.
  • Gas Masks: A wartime customer returns a substandard gas mask.
  • Bletchley Park 1, 2 and 3: A set of 3 short sketches celebrating the great technological breakthroughs by the boffins of Bletchley Park.
  • The Food Rationing Auction: War time rationing leads to an unusual auction!
  • The 12 Days of Blitzkrieg: An alternative set of lyrics to sing to the tune of the Twelve days of Christmas!
  • Four POWs: A group of four World War 2 veterans reminisce on their wartime prisoner of war experiences.  With more than a nod to Monty Python’s ‘Four Yorkshiremen’!
  • Wartime Ready, Steady, Cook!: With wartime rationing the game show Ready Steady Cook has a very different look and feel!
  • Bomber Command: The Pilot and Flight Engineer of a Lancaster Bomber face trouble from ‘the passengers’ in the back!
  • The Land Army: During a routine inspection of a squad of Land Army girls, the visiting officer has some suspicions that all is not what it seems…

Many of the sketches are available to purchase and perform separately – see our Sketches page

Apply for Performance Rights:

Licensing: This script is published through Lazy Bee Scripts. To read the whole script online and to make an application to perform the show please visit Lazy Bee Scripts.

Lazy Bee Scripts

The Bright and Shiny Radio Show

performances to date

Running Time:

45m approximately

Cast:

Minimum 3m, 1f but parts for up to 45 performers

Written in collaboration with Mark Neil and Brian Two

Originally produced and performed by the writers at the Buxton Fringe Festival 2010 (where it received a fantastic review: “…material that’s primetime Radio 4… and pokes fun without threatening to remove your comfort blanket”.) this is a collection of silly sketches to be performed in radio style (either as an audio recording or on stage with the cast standing around a microphone).

The script comes with a set of daft audio jingles / links that can be played between sketches.

With a minimum cast of 4 performers (no maximum limit). There are 2 versions of the scripts – one with stronger language and some extra more adult subject sketches (27 in all) and a Family edition one with milder language and fewer sketches (23).

A number of the sketches are available separately.

Sketches include:

  • Evil Laugh: A job applicant with an unfortunate ‘disability’ attends an interview
  • Questions of the Day x 3: A Bishop leads a discussion on questions of the day (Three short sketches) (In stronger language version only)
  • Loyalty scheme: A customer is introduced to the Army Surplus Loyalty Scheme (In stronger language version only)
  • Would you like it in a bag? X 4: Four sketches concerning purchases of various items.
  • Heading home: A pair of homing pigeons get lost
  • B-List Bomb Blast: A brand new game show involving celebrities and a mine field!
  • The private life of snakes: Two snakes discuss how to deal with David Attenborough!
  • A format too far: Danny has a great idea for a new TV show format.
  • Jamie’s drunken munchies: After a few drinks too many, TV Chef Jamie shows us how to rustle up a fabulous meal.
  • Threatening call: Mr Lampwick receives a strange and threatening phone call.
  • Big Bunker: The latest iteration of Big Brother format; set in Hitler’s World War II bunker! (In stronger language version only)
  • Cross Examination: A court case reaches the final stages before sentencing
  • Four Horsemen: The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse discuss their ride and the merits of the ‘Police Academy’ movies!
  • X Factor: Geoffrey enters X Factor with a truly unique and one off act.
  • A matter of pride: Mr Strong goes for a job interview and discovers he is up against some fierce competition.
  • Mountains of the Mallthrills: A customer visits a department store for a personal shopper experience but has got her wires crossed and booked with the wrong department.
  • Minimum Deposit: A rather confused potential customer visits a Sperm Bank and asks about the account benefits.
  • This is your Larvae: A new take on the popular ancestor discovery show “Who do you think you are?”.
  • Absence Management: Brian, absent from work, is called at home by his boss.
  • Russell at the Doctor: Russell goes for a medical check up and discovers that he has been allocated a new Doctor.
  • Hit man: A ‘Green’ assassin for hire conducts business.
  • A job for unlife: An interview with a vampire! One of the bloodsucking undead attempts to recruit a new member!

Apply for Performance Rights: Family Edition

Licensing: This script is published through Lazy Bee Scripts. To read the whole script online and to make an application to perform the show please visit Lazy Bee Scripts.

Lazy Bee Scripts

Apply for Performance Rights: Stronger language version

Licensing: This script is published through Lazy Bee Scripts. To read the whole script online and to make an application to perform the show please visit Lazy Bee Scripts.

Lazy Bee Scripts

The Talky Bits

performances to date

Running Time:

35m approximately

Cast:

Minimum 1f and 6 either

Written in collaboration with Brian Two

A set of 10 theatrically-themed sketches for Dance and Drama Showcases.

Perfect to perform between your bigger dance or musical numbers.

These sketches take a look at some of the different aspects of putting on a show.

They can be performed as a group or as standalone pieces, adding up to around half an hour of sketch comedy to your show or revue.

With a minimum cast of 7 performers (no maximum limit) and minimal set requirements.

Sketches include:

  • Pitching the show: Getting the show on the road is all about the initial creative pitch…
  • Securing the sponsor: For many shows, securing a sponsor to help finance the production is a crucial task.
  • Nailing the Audition: Finding the best cast for your show is always a problem…
  • Setting the scene: Getting the right look and feel for a show is critical to wow the audiences. But that costs money…
  • No such thing as bad publicity: They say there is no such thing as bad publicity… are they right?
  • Making up the make-up: New make-up girl Donna is not quite what the director expected…
  • A well organised rehearsal: From the first read-through, preparation is the key…
  • Break both legs: As all actors know, there are plenty of superstitions linked to the theatre…
  • Diva!: It can be hard work coping with a Diva!
  • First night nerves: It’s first night and the nerves are showing…

Many of the sketches are available to purchase and perform separately.

Apply for Performance Rights:

Licensing: This script is published through Lazy Bee Scripts. To read the whole script online and to make an application to perform the show please visit Lazy Bee Scripts.

Lazy Bee Scripts